So I am watching the Roast of Bob Saget tonight, not that I am all interested in watching washed up comics rip on Saget, I want to see how many Mary-Kate and Ashley Olson references there will be tonight...I have the over under at 11.5...
Stamos gives the first Olson twins reference 6 mins in....10 to go
10 mins into the show and the most excited I have been so far is that Norm McDonald is there
Greg Giraldo up first and another Olson twins reference, 9 more, also a Ledger reference...too soon, I think he would kick the shit out of this clown trying to be funny....Honestly, don't these comics get it...they are not funny...the only gigs they get are when Comedy Central has a Roast...hang it up man....
Is Lewis Black here at all? Or Jodie Sweetin, aka Stephanie Tanner...I wonder if she is sitting in the crowd tonight thinking, "How Rude!"
Up next in this "laugh-fest," Jon Lovitz, here we go.....I wonder how many times he can make me laugh...I have it at maybe 1/2, he is going to sing now, Lovitz that is, time to see if gymnastics is on NBC or MSNBC or CNBC or Animal Planet....all on commercials...imagine that hmmmmm I can not wait till the talking bird from Aladdin gets a chance to talk on here....No Olson reference,that might hurt the over/under
Jeffrey Ross time now, first joke to the girls sitting on stage that they were still here from last year's roast...funny, so is he...I love that Norm is sitting on the couch...reading the paper...funniest thing yet....two Olson references by Ross...way to make up for Lovitz...7 left to go...may have been way to low on the 11 guess....
Kick Ass, a Lewis Black appearance coming up! Damn it, that means I have to keep doing this....
commercial break...Just saw a preview for a new Kate Hudson/Dane Cook/Jason Biggs movie opening in September, do actors ever see a preview for their own movies and think to themselves...wow, i suck....if that movie makes over 50 million, I am moving to Siberia...
LEWIS BLACK TIME, this is awesome...not only did I actually laugh...I can turn this crap off as soon as I get to 11 Olson references....
Let us see here, Susie Essman...don't know you, don't care...mention the Olsons and get the hell off the stage...perfect time to use the bathroom....there it is...6 more Olson twins mentions to go...Essman, not funny at all...
The Bigfoot/Axe Murder is up now...Brian Posehn....HAHAHA the first laugh I have had when this clown talked about Lisa Lampanelli, I would repeat what he said..but I won't..I have an inch of class...Keeps the trend going...5 more times for a "popsicle stick" (Olson Twins) references to go and I can go do something productive with my night....looking forward to seeing Norm in a few minutes...
Random thought....What the hell ever happened to MTV, do they still play videos? Is TRL still on? Or did they just say screw it, no more videos and we will show 24 hours non stop of NEXT and Making the Band.....
Grandmother look a like Cloris Leachamn is taking a turn now...thanks to Wikipedia, I am figuring out just who the hell this lady is.....she is was in Young Frankenstein, Beerfest, Beavis and Butthead do America, Bad Santa and more...who knew? Thanks wikipedia...hmm this chick won an Academy Award..for what? Who cares.... Norm looks confused every time they show him...wondering if he is thinking about his part in Family Guy as "Death"..the better "Death" of the two voices who have done that character....anywho...right about now, I would rather be watching the Minnesota Timberwolves in an inter-squad game....no Olson reference...I am torn as I wonder if Saget's Olson twins jokes should count....hmmm we will see....4 roasters to go
commercial break....How do you think George Lucas came up with Jawas?
time for Norm....hope this is good...he needs to use cue cards....wonder if he is sober..classic Norm humor....he is laughing at his own jokes....HAHA....I am over my laughing count...HAHA, i love Norm....here is one of his jokes..."You are like Rin-Tin-Tin.......(Saget looking confused)....you have a dog face....get it...."...HAHA, best one yet...
Jeff Garlin in the batters box now...this should be a three-pitch strike out....time to get some grapes from the fridge.....chalk up another Olson joke....lets see...hmmm...4 more...maybe I will be on with 11....Iago up next..(see Aladdin reference earlier if you don't get it)
Since Sarah Silverman is not there...her Olson joke will be omitted...plus I hate her...
A new roaster on the stage...what happened, they could not get Patton Oswalt? As I try to watch this I notice in the background there is a bar off to the side of the stage, with..surprise...a hot girl behind it...I wonder if it is fully stocked? Has Norm been there tonight? That would explain the note cards...As dumb as this section of this post is....it does not hold a candle to how dumb I feel right now, sitting and watching this...I have no idea why I was so excited to watch this...oh well
Is Micheal Phelps swimming tonight?
Thanks to Wikipedia...they are updating this Roast as it happens...it is insane how fast they get information up on that site...
I am going to pre-empt Gilbert Gottfried's appearance by wondering allowed who would win in a cage fight...Iago or Abu? Thinking about this should help distract from the ringing in my ears due to having to hear Gottfried talk... I am having sudden urges to buy Aflac insurance right now.....as I try not to listen to the duck talk, I found out this roast was supposed to be about Willie Nelson, however, it was postponed and not taped....that show might be worse than this one...kudos Comedy Central...here come the Olson joke....HAHA that was a good one, watch the show to get it...3 to go....I have decided that Silvermann's reference will count...which by my Brown College math makes it 2 more to go....
Saget's turn.....nice touch with the "Full House" theme before he begins....doing the ripping on all the people that tried to make fun of him earlier....no Olson's yet....but an Aladdin joke...the word "repugnant" surfaced, interesting....DAMN IT, no Olsons....I loose to myself, now I got to go and figure out why I watched all of this....it was fun...sort of...final tally...9
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Yeah, for some reason, I thought it was going to be better..... but it's comedy central...I should have known better.
live blogging...interesting. I gave that a shot once, while I was drunk. Watching Comedy Central late at night and was really annoyed with how unfunny Jim Gaffigan is....so I posted a live blog about it. It has since been deleted.
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